Homeschoolers & Socialization

[For those readers whose children go to public schools, please don't read this unless you have a sense of humor . One of the reasons it's funny to me is because of how much it mirrors mine and my husband's public school experiences. It's not intended by me to be a "slam" against people making different educational choices, OK? You know your own threshold for being able to take a joke. So, seriously, if you're going to be offended, don't read any further.]

A friend of mine, Leanne, found this in an Austrailian homeschooling journal, --"In the Kolbe Little Home Journal (Fall 2005), "Homeschooling Family Finds Ways to Adapt to a Public School 'Socialization' Program", and it cracked me up. Just wanted to pass it along for your amusement:

"When my wife and I mention we are strongly considering home schooling our children, we are without fail asked, 'But what about socialization?--' Fortunately, we found a way our kids can receive the same socialization that government schools provide.

On Mondays and Wednesdays, I will personally corner my son in the bathroom, give him a wedgie and take his lunch money.

On Tuesdays and Thursdays, my wife will make sure to tease our children for not being in the 'in' crowd, taking special care to poke fun at any physical abnormalities.

Fridays will be 'Fad and Peer Pressure Day.' We will all compete to see who has the coolest toys, the most expensive clothes, and the loudest, fastest, and most dangerous car.

Every day, my wife and I will adhere to a routine of cursing and swearing in the hall and mentioning our weekend exploits with alcohol and immorality..--.. And we have asked them to report us to the authorities in the event we mention faith, religion, or try to bring up morals and values."

Simple enough! :)